Each week, THE FIVE brings you "Confessions from a Wing Girl," from Marni Kinrys--a woman who puts her insider knowledge to good use for the betterment of all men by telling them what women REALLY want, not what they say they want.
Marni has worked with 100's of thousands of men all over the world to help them understand women so they can attract, date, seduce and get any woman they want without being a jerk. Her method, The Wing Girl Method, is based on the key principle of "You gotta turn yourself on first before any woman will ever be attracted to you". For more about Marni, click here.
Here is Confessions from a Wing Girl #5: "How Do I Ask A Girl Out?"
A QUESTION FROM JAMES:
I am having trouble deciding on how to approach this girl that I am interested in at work. We are both on different teams so we do not get the chance to interact. She sat at my table once during lunch break and I could not start a meaningful conversation. Since then I can tell she is nervous and does not sit at my table anymore.
I definitely feel the attraction and it is very strong. We have both checked each other out on multiple occasions with our glances meeting eye to eye at certain points. Since we both work at a small company I know her name and was thinking about emailing her straight up. The message would be kept short and would go something like:
“Hey, I have been meaning to talk to you. Do you have time for a quick break?”
From there I will lead her outside and let her know how I feel.
Please advise. I feel as though I cannot wait any longer.
AND SOME WISE WORDS FROM MARNI
Seems like you are letting this situation put a lot of pressure on you. Analyzing her actions, attempting to mind read what a look means.
I’m going to tell you this and you may not like it:
You will never be able to read a woman’s mind, no matter how hard you try. You will also never be able to control an outcome and keep yourself safe from potential risk.
This “what is she thinking and how do I play it so that I get what I want” games gotta end now.
Here’s what you need to know about women.
We know when you’re into us. At first, we’re open and ready to be approached and asked out. Then if you delay asking us out, we slowly start to doubt your masculinity and attraction decreases at a steady pace.
The longer you wait, the creepier you become. Until you reach a point of no return.
Here’s what I want you to do so that you don’t fall into the creep category and turn this woman off for good.
You are going to ask her out, cause that’s what you want right?
You want to take her out on a date, get to know her better and see if there is something there. Or you may just want to have sex with her but both end goals have to start with asking her out.
1). Do not hide behind an indirect, non-specific, low confidence email that kind of says, “I like you”. Talk to her. Show her that you are a confident man who doesn’t need to hide behind a computer.
2). Be direct and ask for what you want: “You’re really X. I want to talk to you when we’re not in the office and get to know you better. Drinks or a coffee. What are you doing next X?
The only way to get what you want is by asking for it!
So if you want to get to know her better – suggest getting to know her better.
If you want to take her out for a drink – ask her out for a drink.
If you want to kiss her – kiss her!!!!
If she doesn’t want any of the above, she’ll let you know. But let her do the rejecting instead of you rejecting yourself.
Have a question for Marni? Email us and see if the Wing Girl Method might work for you.