I’m Surrounded by the Ironic Mustache.

Lately, it seems like everyone I know is sprouting an ironic mustache. You know, that hipster accouterment that is a hairy growth on one’s upper lip that was originally started as a joke, but now it has become part of their “look.” Sometimes the creation of the ironic mustache was started to prove a level of manliness and to defy those naysayers who doubted their folic capabilities, and commitment necessary to maintain said facial growth.

Phillipe Halsman image of Salvador Daii

For some, the ability to grow a furry ‘stache is simple and almost impossible to control. I have friends who have five-o’clock shadows before 2pm. They call shaving “weed wacking” and loath the thought of it. For others, like me, commitment to growing a ‘stache is a month-long activity that delivers only a barely-noticeable light blonde scruff atop my lip.

But for those more folicly talented than I, the ironic mustache has gained broad popularity with the growth of the Movember movement. It is an activity each November when men raise awareness and funds for men's health issues, specifically prostate and testicular cancer initiatives, by not shaving the space between nose and lip for a full month.

But regardless of folic talent and raison d’etre, the ironic mustache is typically grown and kept to be noticed, and to provide character. Some ironic mustaches resemble a Wild West Barber or Bartender, and require a bit of mustache wax at their ends. Others sport a Mexican Pencil ‘stache—similar to the Salvador Dali or the John Waters. And others grow what I call the Manly Freida Kahlo –barely noticeable until you are at close quarters with said ironic hipster. Some ironic mustaches are accompanied by a burly beard—of the ZZ Top variety, or in the style of San Francisco Giants pitcher Brian Wilson.

But regardless of style, I say most mustaches remain far longer than they are funny, purposeful, or even ironic. But remember, that opinion is coming from the guy who can only muster and ‘stache noticeable under a microscope, or at very close range.


Primary Image courtesy of Shutterstock

Illustration courtesy of Shutterstock




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