It’s been said that you are an average of the five people that you spend the most time with. It’s an easy concept to understand, but few of us are able to leverage this. With each day that comes and goes, there is an ebb and flow of people from our life. Relationships change in a variety of ways with varying levels of impact. You get into a fight with your partner; you bond with a coworker; the person you thought would always be there, isn’t.
The only thing definite about human relationships is the fact that they are far from definite and certainly not permanent. This constant state of flux is what makes prioritizing people in our life so messy. The people around you can help you become the person you want to be, but only if you know who to surround yourself with. These two principles can help simplify the process of prioritizing your relationships.
1. Focus on building meaningful relationships
Your relationships with people have the ability to transcend whatever craziness the universe flings your way. Conversely, relationships are fragile and you can push the people that you care most about out of your life with just a couple of words. That being said, building relationships is not a numbers game. You can have 100 acquaintances that show up to your party because of the open bar, or you can have 1 friend who is there for you through the worst of times. Call a friend that you haven’t spoken to in a while with the sole intent of listening to them talk about what’s going on in their life. Write someone a letter, it doesn’t have to be pen and paper sent through snail mail, but make it longer than a tweet at the very minimum. Do the unthinkable; walk over to your coworker instead of emailing them. Everyday it is easier to communicate with other people, but meaningful relationships grow organically and can’t be forced by convenience.
Learn my three rules for building meaningful relationships here.
2. Surround yourself with the people who enrich your life
If you are the product of the five people that you spend the most time with, then why would you want those five to treat you poorly? At any given moment you’re putting off energy into the world and taking in energy from the people around you. One of the most impactful things that you could do for yourself is to remove any relationships that are toxic or take away from your happiness. Ending these relationships is difficult, but taking the first step by acknowledging that you are being treated poorly will do wonders. Everything in your life is a choice, so there is no reason to choose to allow someone to make you unhappy. If you take the energy that you put towards toxic relationships and used that time to focus on the people that make you happiest, you’ll see a dramatic change in your life.
What are the five people that you spend the most time around doing to help you become the person that you want to become?
Author Chris Wyman is a modern day renaissance man, a philosopher and a reality sculptor. He believes in living a deliberate life of dreams actualized. You can follow his journey to help people live life powerfully, share your feedback, or reach out for help living the life that you want all on his facebook page.